Bounce
Back from Setback
The last couple of years have tested
our collective resilience – the economic downturn and layoffs
have certainly taken their toll on a lot of
individual lives. But even if you haven’t been a victim
of the recession, it’s a safe bet
you still know what it means to have a setback, whether in a relationship,
your health or dealing with any
unexpected challenges. What is it that allows some people to bounce
back while others languish after a setback?
What will empower you to become better as a result of a
setback or challenge, rather than bitter? Research shows that resilient people think
differently.
They have a set of skills –
sometimes learned, other times innate – that allow them to persevere,
manage stress and triumph in the face of
challenges.
Here are five of the things resilient people do...
Resilient people are at peace with their
humanity. Perhaps it is because their mistakes along the way have humbled them, or life experiences have helped them accept their own vulnerability, but resilient
people don’t let imperfections hinder them. They don’t think failing means being a “failure.”
They learn as they go, making course corrections that lead them to positive outcomes.
Even if initially, they struggle with negative thoughts, resilient people are self-aware enough to notice
when their thinking is counterproductive. They don’t fall into thinking traps such as jumping to conclusions
or making assumptions. Instead, they gather the facts they need to move around obstacles and face the
challenge head on. If something isn’t working, they make adjustments until it works. They find the
aspects of their challenge that are within their control and they exercise that control. So when faced
with a cancer diagnosis, they change their eating habits to help them recover. When they get passed
over for promotion, they find the grain of truth in the boss’ negative review and start making improvements.
It’s hard to bounce back from setbacks when you see every obstacle as the end of the world! Research
shows that optimists live as much as nine years longer than pessimists. Seeing the bright side is good
for your health and longevity. But it isn’t about simplistic “positive thinking.” Resilient people see
risks and take precautions to prevent problems. But when faced with a challenge, they are more
likely to say, “I can get through this,” whether it is a tough class at school, a divorce or the loss of a loved one.
Resilient people don’t go it alone. They have close friends and are not too proud to ask for help
when they need it, talk out problems, or help others in need. When faced with a stressful situation,
just knowing you have support can alleviate the pressure. Strengthen your relationships. They make
you stronger. Everyone has innate talents and strengths. When faced with a challenge, there is power in tapping
into those strengths – the things that come naturally to you. It takes less energy to use your strengths,
in fact, you are energized by your strengths.
Know what yours are and use them.